Keeping in mind that we would be having a time of evanglism of this weekend, my prayer for this week has been that God would do something during our evangelism. Something big, something noticable, something that can only be described as one of those awesome God moments. I was excited to see what He would do.
On Saturday, we evangelized at two different places. On the train between points of evangelism, I was thinking and trying to remember if there had been any big God moments. I was having trouble coming up with any. I wondered if I'd missed some that had happened, and thought that maybe something would happen during the next part of our evangelism. In all honesty, because I'd been praying that prayer all week, I was feeling a little disappointed not to have noticed anything.
Then a thought popped into my head as I realized something - the evanglism had been a lot different for me personally today. There was no fear of rejection. Evangelism here in Spain can be hard, because people are so closed - they often say no, or sometimes they completely ignore you. This can make it really hard to feel motivated to give people tracts. I was rejected today, but at today's location, people seemed a little more receptive to at least taking the tracts (and thinking back now, this in itself may have been a God moment, one that I didn't realize until right now as I'm typing this). I wasn't afraid to go up to people and give them the tract. I'm not the kind of person to really interact at all with people that I don't know, especially strangers. But somehow, I didn't mind today (the fact that I know I'll probably never see them again always adds a little something...).
There was something else I was thinking about, something I realized during one of our previous times of evangelism. Hypothetical situation: I pass a person on the street, but because of fear or some other factor, I choose not to give that person a tract. What happens if that exact moment in time was the only time in that person's life that they would be receptive to taking that tract and reading it? What if that was the one time in their life that they would have curiosity about religion, about Christianity, and that they would have the courage to follow up on it? Who am I to deny that person the opportunity that will only happen once, when they would never be receptive again, and would therefore never hear the wonderful truth that I am priveliged to know? That person would never be able to experience the joy and saving grace of having a personal relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ.
Let me tell you...walking around with that weight on your shoulders when trying to evangelize isn't the best thing...I would feel guilty for every person that passed to whom I did not give a tract. So, I decided there was only one thing I could do to not feel guilty as we where evangelizing - give a tract to every person I see while evangelizing.
Something did happen today. It may not have been very big, at least in my eyes, but it was something. The evangelism has changed me. I am no longer afraid to go up to people and give them a tract. The worst thing that could happen? They don't take the tract. This just gives me the opportunity to pray for that person, that they will have another opportunity sometime in which they take the time to read or listen or learn. In the past, had you told me that I would be evangelizing now, I wouldn't have believed you.
But God is changing me. Me, the missionary. Me, the one who is supposed to be helping the people here. Me, the one who is supposed to be changing other people during times of evangelism. It seems so backwards.
But maybe my new-found openness to evangelism is preparing me for something that's going to happen during one of our next evangelism times. Something big, something noticeable, something that can only be described as a God moment. That's my new prayer for the coming weeks. And I'll also be looking for God moments, in unexpected places ... gotta love God's sense of humor!
5 years ago